Yesterday evening I attended the funeral prayers of an uncle of mine who died at the age of 75. Last few decades of his life were so miserable that people often quoted his example when describing how bad life could be. He did not have any kids or friends and his house was at a terrible place surrounded by garbage and dirty water from sewers. His wife, a very intelligent lady who died few years ago, lived a terrible life with him. She had to relay on her own income of teaching for her pocket money. She probably could have lived a better and beautiful life if she had not married at all instead of marrying him.
But the irony was he could change his miserable life himself without any effort. He had good amount of funds in terms of hard cash, gold and a real estate property which he made from his hard work in his young life. He could, overnight, become a different person by spending that money. But instead he choose to live a miserable life and left all his wealth to people who were hardly part of his life.
He was stuck in life; a stagnation that had happened many decades before his death.
While sitting at his house, close to his dead body, my brother asked why this happened and, despite all life experience, why he was not able entertain a thought in his mind which could change his life?
It was a difficult question to answer. We could think of all small things he could do for a better life but that was not the answer of the above question. Why he did not actually take any step to improve even when knowing every thing and having the resources to do that? What was in his mind which prevented good things to happen in his life?
Or did he really know he was stuck in life?
It is so easy to single out other people who are stuck in life but probably close to impossible to point out the same thing about ourselves. But if getting stuck in life is a possibility for others then it is also a possibility for us. And this departed soul was facing the same dilemma; he did not know he was stuck and he did not change his life for better.
This is a terrible thought, but real possibility, that we are also stuck in our life in a way we are not realizing.
Having a life style where we keep experimenting and changing our work habits, keep questioning the our ideology of life and keep helping others may be the simplest recipe to not get stuck. May be there are other ways to not get stuck but we can find them by keep questioning our ideology of life as we live through life.